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Spot Check
Ala Moana Beachpark Wall (aka the Cooch)
February 4, 1997
| Ok, well it's been a while (about 2 months) since we've written anything new, so this should come as a refresher to those who actually care. We've given up this skateboarding thing and decided to become professional faggots. One day, while working out at the beach like I do every morning, you know doing the aerobic, full body tan, power pecto-lat flex stretches, I noticed something. The wall which separates Ala Moana Beach from the sidewalk, previously a rough rock wall, has been redone in cement, painted, and is now completely skatetable. Well, I mean if anybody really skates anymore. In no time, some surfer's going to wax the motherfucker instead of his surfboard and we are talking ledge heaven. |
Mike, and the rest of us at 50-50, don't condone skating Ala Moana Beach park, or any other illegal places for that matter, even though it is fun as shit. |
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Even the cops don't give a crap right now, so keep it low key. I give it about 2 months, and skating will be completely banned at the beach park, but what better way to show your appreciation to the state than with a loud, barking 50-50? You even get a lot of attention down there, and we are talking appreciative tourist butt-floss bikini queens.
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"Hey man, that's an awesome tan. I want every one of you to come down and skate my wall. Don't forget to bring your wax and sunscreen, you big hunky stud man"
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There's only one downer to skating the park right now, and that there is a real nosy fucker (pictured on the left), who feels it is his personal responsibility to lecture you on how much it bothers him that we spray paint grafitti on the wall, and oh yeah, how skateboards are destroying his pristine world of perfect cement. He even has his own vigilante tactics and tries to push you off your skateboard as you ride by. This is just a warning, but if you see him out there, don't hesitate to give him the thumbs up and tell him how much you really like his breast reduction surgery. |
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